Trendy: Supernatural dolls called 'Angel Child'

My encounter with the 'look thep'.

On a recent trip to Bangkok, I saw a lady cradling a baby-sized doll in her lap. I wondered what it could possibly be for. Then while boarding the plane, the lady in front of me was carrying a doll, just as you might carry a baby. I’d heard of dolls that are given to teenage girls in the UK to mimic actual babies, intended to put them off unwanted pregnancy. But these women seemed too old for that...

I asked the lady in front of me and she laughed nervously. “It’s an angel doll”, she said, “it’s what we believe in”. Curious, I asked more questions. “If you look after it like your child, it helps your business”, she said. I told my Thai Christian friend who was flying with me and she was shocked and repulsed. “It’s an evil spirit inside the doll!” she exclaimed. But she had never seen anything like it before. “Satan never rests”, she said, “he is always thinking up new ways to deceive people."

What are they?

The luk thep, or angel child dolls are a new religious trend that is now all over the news and social media. They cost from 2,000 baht (£40) to 20,000 baht (£400), and were popularised by celebrities who claimed dressing up and feeding the figurines had brought them success. Doll-mania has since swept up the superstitious, with adults bringing the figures to Buddhist ceremonies, restaurants and even on planes, where they are even issued seats and served refreshments. Thai media published a leaked airline memo that defined the "child angels" as "a doll that is alive".

What do Thais think and why? 

A doll painted with holy gold sheets in its eyes and
 mouth. They were applied in rituals by Buddhist monks. 

While adherents believe the dolls hold children's spirits which bring good luck, wealth, blessing and protection from harm, there are many Thais who also ridicule the craze. A (Buddhist) girl I know started talking about how crazy people are to “take the bad thing and the evil thing, and call it a good thing”. She knows that while the angel doll trend only started last year, the practice has roots in the ancient occult worship of preserved stillborn/aborted foetuses thought to contain a child's spirit. While the lady on the plane told me “this is what Thai Buddhists believe”, this other girl was aghast at how fellow Buddhists could be so foolish. 

What are they really? 

A friend in Bangkok shared this story:

This incident occurred at a church member’s restaurant.  A customer had come into the restaurant for lunch, and with them they brought their  “look thep”.  They ordered their meal and also ordered a separate meal for their doll. After ordering, the customer tells her “look thep” to go ahead and go run around the restaurant while they waited for the food.  Not long after, one of the waitresses starts acting funny, like a child.  She starts running around the restaurant and then goes to ask another server for some red Fanta. **(Spirits are known to like red Fanta as offerings.) The fellow server gives the waitress water instead. At this point, the waitress is not happy, and it becomes evident that something is wrong with her.  Another worker at the restaurant, who is a Christian, recognizes that the waitress is being possessed by an evil spirit a.k.a. the “look thep”.  This Christian worker then prays and rebukes the evil spirit and it leaves the waitress. After the spirit leaves the waitress, she loses all strength and just folds to the floor, vomiting.  Soon after, other (Buddhist) employees gather round the waitress and hang a necklace with an amulet (Buddha) around her neck for “protection”.  She should’ve been fine, but to their shock the spirit re-entered the waitress a second time. Now, the Christian owner of the restaurant steps in, prays to rebuke the spirit not only out of the waitress but out of the restaurant completely. These “look thep” dolls are actually a deceptively glorified version of an old Thai practice — the worship of evil spirits made 'cuter'. Though many Buddhist monks have participated in blessing or praying spirits into these dolls, one monk interestingly said, “Don’t you think it funny that Thailand has come to the point of bowing down to dolls and asking for their blessing?”    Why are they popular? Although more than 90% of Thais identify as Buddhist, the country's Buddhism is known for its syncretism, comfortably blending many animist and Hindu traditions into daily worship. The ‘Angel Child’ doll is only one of a whole array of gods in their belief system, along with items on their ‘god shelf' at home, amulets, images and incantations around their neck, on their body and in their car. All are hoped to be a quick-fix to life's difficulties, especially in times of struggling economy and ongoing political instability. This desire also provides insatiable demand for fortune tellers, astrologers, spiritists, etc. in Thai society. The 'look thep' is just a glimpse, a symptom of desperation.  How do we pray? My friend and I spent the rest of the plane journey praying for Thailand. The spiritual battle is strong, strong enough to blind and trap religious Thais into worshipping evil spirits by disguising it as an innocent doll.  As unbelievable as this whole trend may be, the Apostle Paul wrote, “But I am not surprised! Even Satan can disguise himself as an angel of light. (2 Cor. 11:14)”  Thai people are inherently spiritual and have a strong faith, but that faith is so misplaced from Jesus, the true Light of life. Yes they are desperate, but not desperate enough! They want a god they can add to their shelf, who will play by their rules. The think the darkness is light.   "But their minds were made dull, for to this day the same veil remains when the old covenant is read. It has not been removed, because only in Christ is it taken away." (2 Cor 3:14)  May the people who walk in the darkness see the great Light, may the veil be taken away.  May the power of the Holy Spirit demolish demonic strongholds.  May the Kingdom of Heaven break into the darkness and be established forever.  Sources:  http://www.bangkokpost.com/photo/photo/838584/child-angel-dolls-cute-or-scary-religious-or-ridiculous http://www.bangkokpost.com/opinion/opinion/839964/looking-trendy-but-stupid http://www.bangkokpost.com/news/general/840180/angel-doll-vendors-busted-for-tax-evasion http://us10.campaign-archive1.com/?u=9642cfdcf81881885e0bc891e&id=9d9ce0474c&e=aab159e999

Surin - the jigsaw comes together

How could I be called to the Isaan people... but also the Cambodians?  

In 2007 I first had a clear sense of my long term calling to overseas mission and specifically to unreached people in Southeast Asia. Then in 2010 I felt sure that He had called me to serve in Cambodia. Only in 2013 did I realise through my appointment with Pioneers, that Cambodians were now considered a 'reached' people group - meaning the local church had grown large and strong enough to reach its own people. And unexpectedly, as I turned my attention to the unreached people groups in Isaan, Thailand I had a strange peace that this was right too. Everyone seemed in agreement and my own spirit confirmed it. It felt right. I didn't understand the whole Cambodia thing - had it been a mistake?

Surin (red), in relation to Isaan (orange) and Thailand.

Since coming to Isaan in 2013, I spent the first year learning Thai language full time. The second year I was starting to be more involved in ministry with less time in language learning, all the while praying about our team vision - where did God want me to go within Isaan? Our team vision includes splitting into 5 smaller teams for 5 of the least reached provinces within Isaan. Of the 5, I have leaned towards 1 called Surin ever since I came, because it borders Cambodia. Last year it looked like there was a team coming together to work there, then everything fell through and I was back to square one.

But as we prayed, God was working. When I returned in October this year after my first home assignment, I met a family who has just joined our team here. They are called the Tongs - a Cambodian man (Koeun) married to an American lady (Danielle) and 2 very cute kids aged 3 and 5. They came to Isaan specifically to minister to the Surin people group. As soon as I met them, I sensed a spiritual and personality 'click' that I haven't had until this point with anyone in the team. I said to Danielle after our first proper (3 hr) chat, that she was the answer to my prayers - God had sent someone really on the same page, a good fit for me to minister on a small team with. The more I have got to know the family since then, the more I feel they are a good fit for me to work with.

The Tongs, with me and a missionary we met in Surin 

That very day, I also discovered a Ministry Plan I'd written back in 2013 when I first came - and it said on it that long term I was headed to the Surin province. That was geographical confirmation. Even the style of ministry I'd written about on that Plan fitted exactly the style Danielle had talked about using. Only God could do this!

As excitement built however, fear also built. Surin is well known for 2 things in Thailand - elephants, and black magic. Thai people I talked to started sowing seeds of fear - "If you go to Surin, be careful, it's dangerous". Black magic spells and potions aren't fantasy in Surin, they are reality, and are responsible for controlling and destroying many lives. Then there was the local language - "It's so different from Thai. It's going to be such hard work. Do you even want to bother?"... the voices in my head went. Khmer-Surin people speak a mixture of Thai and Khmer (Cambodian). It really makes no sense to me at all when I hear it. They usually speak Thai too, but their heart language is not Thai.

On a survey trip, meeting people following nudges of the Spirit

Without my realising, these internal fears built. Until one day, they erupted in my quiet time. As I poured it all out to God, He spoke many words to me - clear, strong affirmations that brought with them great peace. That is what I needed. The same week, several different and unrelated people gave me words about dispelling fear. It also made sense of the words I had received at Hope Church before I left. Fearlessness was to be part of my calling, and I didn't have to conjure it up. He is giving and will give it to me, over and over He spoke it.

Since then I have been to Surin 3 times on Survey trips. Each time we have sensed His presence. There has been no fear. We see Him leading our footsteps. And I see him preparing people to work together. A couple on my team is also prayerfully considering joining this team. Again it is a good fit. Better than any of us could have engineered.

On a survey trip - praying through districts with no churches

Surin is hard ground. There is thick darkness there. But the light shines brightest in those places, and I am hopeful. I have always struggled with the not knowing - the uncertainty about my next step. Wanting to know and worrying about whether I will hear God when He speaks. What a comfort to be reminded that when He speaks, it is always in a way we will understand. It is always for our good. And His words come with the power to accomplish them! I am hopeful, I am expectant. Most of all, I am amazed at our good, good Father. All along, he was calling me both to the Cambodians, and to the Isaan. Who would have thought it - I am called to the Cambodian Isaan - the 'Khmer Surin', and with a bunch of great people that God is even now bringing together!

For a video made by the Tongs on the Khmer-Surin people, click here.

Wales vs. Isaan

Living overseas means life is constantly throwing up contrasts and comparisons. Spending 2 years here, then returning to Wales for 3 months and then coming back here has felt a little like living two lives, in two different worlds. So I thought it was rather appropriate that on my return to Thailand I had to report to Immigration within 24 hours that 'the alien' has taken up residence again. :)

It can be disorientating for us aliens as we shuttle back and forth between our worlds, often feeling like the only thing certain is Uncertainty. So humour me as I use this blog post to process some of my thoughts in a match usually commentated only in my head.

How Wales is hard to beat	Why Isaan is awesome
I can hug my Mum.  My brother makes me laugh till I cry.  My church family remind me how to pray.  I can enjoy hot baths and snuggle in a duvet.  Roast dinner… mmm… enough said.  I can go for long walks.  People think it’s normal to drink tea my way.  I can string sentences together, read and write without even trying.  I can flush toilet paper.	Eating out is cheap as chips… or cheaper.  You can wear T-shirts and shorts in winter.  Mangoes and sticky rice… mmm…  I can chill in my hammock outside at night.  Planning meals is easy – it’s always rice.  My team are amazing and diverse.  House church reminds me that simple is effective, and engagement isn’t optional.  2 hours in the sun makes laundry bone dry.
But then…
It’s almost always windy, raining or both.  Idols are everywhere - money, entertainment, independence, comfort...  Everything costs 2-10 times as much.  The sea is always too cold to swim in, even in summer.  You can’t get stuff fixed, you have to get a new one  You have to wait ages for laundry to dry.	Idols and spirit shrines are everywhere.  They speak 2 languages, neither of which is English.  You’re covered in sweat by the time you get dressed from the shower.  Cockroaches crawl out of the sink.  Mosquito and ant bites are no fun.   Watching TV isn't relaxing.  Driving hazards keep the adrenaline flowing.

I consider myself truly blessed to be able to live in two worlds - but I am surer than ever that I am here in Isaan because God wants me here. Since getting back, I have hit the ground running. I'm grateful that this time round, I can speak the language fairly well, have good Thai friends and can plug into various ministries where God has opened doors. But so as not to rush into things, and to re-orientate myself, I have taken this week to wait on God.

Lord, thank you for the unique way you have wired each of us. Please show us the passions you have placed in us, and lead us into all you have purposed, to bear fruit for your kingdom in the particular way that only I can bear. Wherever you have placed us, help us to know, more than ever, that we are hidden in your heart. Help us to follow your heartbeat.       Amen. 

Travels with Jesus

I have been blessed to be able to go away with my family, attend my brother's graduation, attend Focus conference with the Mariners church family, and meet with my Pioneers UK leaders for a time of debriefing, among many other things. There has already been a lot of travelling since I've been back, and there is more to come. 

While it is a joy to see so many of you in this way, and I am utterly thankful to God for providing a car (my old car, no less!) I was not looking forward to travelling alone. That was when Daddy reminded me that I will not be alone. Jesus will be in the plane and in the car with me. And so it has become a joy. 


Isn't that a life lesson for all of us? I am realising that Satan would like nothing better than for us to be bound by fear - fear of what will or won't happen, never-ending "What ifs" hanging over us like ominous clouds, stealing the joy of the present moment. And yet Jesus longs for us to simply trust Him. He has always been faithful. 

Time and again I have been like Martha, "worried and concerned about many things" because is my limited understanding and imagination, I don't know how things are going to turn out tomorrow. In my attempts to control what I cannot control, I lose today's joy in worrying about tomorrow, only to find that tomorrow is in Daddy's hands and I needn't have worried. That's not to say everything will always be easy. But there is always enough grace. 

There are so many testimonies of how Daddy's taking care of me at the moment. One that I want to share is an answered prayer. I had shared a concern with a group of friends from my home church and they had covered the need in prayer - the need for a ministry partner in the coming months. The very next day I received a text message from a team member in Ubon, saying she can't wait for me to come back so that we can do a particular ministry together! How good is our Father? 

How the other half live

Isaan is unusual in that 50% of the population lives in rural areas. Doing a home-stay with a family in the village where I teach gave me insider insights into village life that outsiders can't learn any other way.  As I draw to the end of my first 'term' in Isaan, I feel like these 2 weeks in the village have been representative of my 2 years in Isaan. There have been joys and challenges in equal measure.

Child boxers as young as 7 and 8 in a village festival. While they will win around £20, bets placed on them can be anywhere from  £2 to £1000. The pressure from the community is intense. Makes me wonder about the boys I teach, are they into this?

The language learning curve is steep, and honestly exhausting... I've never been so quiet. There I was, thinking I was doing well with Thai, only for Isaan to bust my bubble. Village communities speak Isaan almost exclusively. A mix of Thai and Lao, Isaan has a very different sound to Thai, and a lot more personality! To understand anything at all, I have to concentrate really hard. So being surrounded by people speaking only Isaan was exhausting and humbling.  You feel like a baby, struggling to keep up with conversations (of which there are usually several going on at the same time), pretending to laugh along with jokes (which is usually met with a sympathetic "you didn't get it, did you?"), and not wanting to bother people to translate into Thai all the time. In this first term I have made good progress in Thai. But my time in the village has made me desperate to be able to communicate in their heart language, Isaan.

So it was a wonderful blessing to spend time with kids. They are so much easier than grown-ups! They are willing to speak Thai, teaching me phrases in Isaan, repeating them with their gorgeous grin till I get the tones just right. Every day after school we had bigger and bigger groups of kids coming to see us at the house, until eventually we had to move to the school grounds. We played games, taught them songs and stories about God in Thai and English, then had them act out the stories in Isaan. They couldn't seem to get enough of it. I'm so used to kids getting bored quickly - these would happily sing a song 20 times... and they'd practise the words in their lunch break!! 

Chopping eucalyptus trees

Making dried mango roll-ups to snack on. 

Red ants - all stages of the lifecycle are

"yummy". It's an acquired taste...

The work ethic of Isaan people has often been a mystery to me - at first glance it would appear they simply sit around for most of the day. I now realise that as an extended family unit they are endlessly busy with an amazing array of ways to put food on the family plate. My host family planted rice, grew and sold eucalyptus trees, farmed fish, raised chickens, ducks and cattle, had a corner shop and coffee stand at the house, sold snacks at the weekly market, sold lottery tickets on the black market and worked with a franchise in Bangkok. Besides this, they regularly went out into the forest to forage for wild mushrooms, bamboo shoots, red ants and all kinds of wild herbs to add to their food. 

Why they need to do all this is also now clear - they don't just provide for their immediate family, but the extended family - which includes most of the village and many in the surrounding villages. The house I stayed in was the family home for 8 people of 3 generations. Add to that seemingly constant visits by the endless relatives, and you never know who is going to join you for lunch, dinner or a snack. Collectivist culture means everyone is always welcome. Kids live in and out of each other's family houses. All of this means that quiet or alone time is non-existent. Why you'd want it anyway is a mystery to them!

Furniture is optional. Most of us have a very different definition of necessities than the Isaan village person. There I was, missing sitting on a sofa; while their bedroom slept 6 people, and contained 2 beds (1 piled with stuff), a TV and a couple of fans. When all you need to sleep is the floor, sleepovers are easy too!

Bathrooms are also optional. On a visit to a friend's house where there was no running water, we discovered showers are regularly taken outdoors. They actually have an enclosed toilet with a bucket of water (which is where I showered), but they are used to showering in a sarong next to the water tank. Ingenious.

Fear is pervasive. Fear of the dark, fear of the river, lightning storms, being alone... most of which at their root, are a fear of evil spirits. Not a day would go by that I would not hear a child or adult express this fear. It cripples them. I wondered why until I discovered that one of the ladies we regularly visit had become possessed by an evil spirit, and that this is commonplace. She hadn't slept for 2 weeks and was in constant pain. She had been to see the spirit doctor, but the painful rituals and amulets she wore hadn't yet worked. The spirit had threatened to eat her insides and eventually kill her if she was left alone. All this was said in front of her ten year old son. He has even witnessed the agony of his mother at the spirit doctor's ritual. Fear perpetuates. 

What saddened me is that she had heard some stories of Jesus. She had noticed that Jesus only had to speak the word and spirits fled. But despite her suffering, she preferred the 'devil she knew'. Jesus is the risky, unknown, foreign God that they are afraid to ask for help. What repercussions will the family face from the spirits and ancestors if Jesus was to intervene? What would people say? Different fears take over, and she remains bound. Only prayer can change this. In a collective culture like Daniel's, where all the children chant and bow together in Buddhist rituals and ceremonies at the temple and at school, what would it take for one to refuse? 

It would take a supernatural move of God. I believe it is a matter of time... He is able, and working in their hearts. This is why we need to pray like we mean it, and keep showing them Jesus until they fall in love with Him. He intends for each precious child, every hardworking adult, every drunk man, every tattooed spirit doctor, everyone created in His image, to live free. That is my prayer for these people I have come to love. 

Growing pains

Life can seem a tangled mess on Earth...

It seems I am always growing… I wonder when I will actually ‘grow up’. I know, growth is a good thing, it means new beginnings and excitement and enlarged capacity. But that involves stretching and growing pains, uncertainty, vulnerability… weakness. I wonder when I will finally feel I’ve arrived. I know the answer and yet it feels like a fresh discovery - the transformation is only complete in heaven. Until then we really are far from home, citizens in a foreign country, where we don’t quite belong.

So why the growing pains? Yes, I want to be more like Jesus. But somehow I would rather bypass the chiselling, because it hurts. The pain is my inner protest because I want to retain control, by having God chisel where I want.

And I'm drawn back to the call I have answered, the call that brings unparalleled joy, eternal purpose and completeness: 

To to worship Him alone. 

To realise that my life no longer belongs to me.

That I no longer sit in the driving seat.

... home is heaven, with no more mess.

That my God is good, He is loving. And He is sovereign. 

That life is NOT about me, it is about Him. 

When everything is going according to my plan, it's easy to trust God. But if we're not careful, we can sometimes wrap the gospel in glitter paper. Yes, we live the resurrection life, the abundant life, we have access to joy and peace which are not of this world. But the fact is, this supernatural fruit is grown through dying daily. 

2 Cor 4:7 But we have this treasure in jars of clay to show that this all-surpassing power is from God and not from us. 8 We are hard pressed on every side, but not crushed; perplexed, but not in despair; 9 persecuted, but not abandoned;struck down, but not destroyed. 10 We always carry around in our body the death of Jesus, so that the life of Jesus may also be revealed in our body. 11 For we who are alive are always being given over to death for Jesus’ sake, so that his life may also be revealed in our mortal body. 

The Corinthians believed that adversity was inconsistent with the Spirit-filled Christian life, let alone with the gospel ministry. Paul, on the other hand, maintained that God's power is seen most effectively through ministerial hardship and distress. These are not only growth pains, but death pains in the normal Christian life. While like to sing songs about Surrender, actually doing it is a little more like dying. We like to be in control of our circumstances and operate from a position of strength. But Jesus being Lord of my life means giving up my right to be in control, and ministering from brokenness. It is in our very weakness that the resurrection life of Jesus is revealed.

George Mueller said of his secret of service to God: "There was a day when I died, utterly died: died to George Mueller, his opinions, preferences, tastes and will - died to the world, its approval or censure, died to the approval or blame even of my brethren and friends - and since then I have studied only to show myself approved unto God."* 

I bet it didn't really happen in a day, and we can be sure there was much pain involved. Why do I forget this so often? I can sometimes live and pray and talk as if God is about making me happy. Until God allows growing pains - or more accurately, dying pains. Why? Because death must come before the resurrection. Sorrow before strength. Pain paves the way for the life of power.

Henri Nouwen writes, "To be healed of resentment and move into gratitude requires me to dance - to believe again, even amid my pain, that God will orchestrate and guide my life. The mystery of the dance is that its movements are discovered in taking the steps one by one: some slow, some quick. Some smooth, some not. If all steps on the journey are movements of grace, we can be grateful for every moment we have lived, knowing that all is grace."^

And if once we start to see that all is grace, we can begin to agree with the apostle Paul: 

Therefore we do not lose heart. Though outwardly we are wasting away, yet inwardly we are being renewed day by day. 17 For our light and momentary troubles are achieving for us an eternal glory that far outweighs them all. 18 So we fix our eyes not on what is seen, but on what is unseen, since what is seen is temporary, but what is unseen is eternal. (2 Cor 4:16 )

For anyone with whom this strikes a chord, who needs a little perspective and encouragement, here's a fantastic sermon by Steven Furtick in his series #DeathToSelfie

'Just because the Bible says God works all things together for our good, does not mean everything feels good all the time. But it’s often our times of greatest struggle that we can gain the most strength and increase our faith. In the final part of our series #DeathToSelfie, Pastor Steven uses the story of Jacob renaming his son Benjamin to show us that, though there are circumstances in our lives we didn't choose to go through, God has given us the rights to call any circumstance a blessing in His name.'

* from Jesus Driven Ministry by A. Fernando. p82

^ from Spiritual Formation by Henri Nouwen. 

Ambushed

When I don't understand 

and wonder if He cares... 

Where are you Lord? 

Unanswered questions 

and unexpected tears

Where are you Lord? 

I blame Him, 

then run to Him

Where are you Lord? 

Hammer at His door, 

then ignore Him

Where are you Lord? 

Hear His voice, 

then wonder if I did

Where are you Lord? 

Blinded by emotion,

too scared to believe

Where are you Lord? 

And then He shows up

When I least expect it ~

Could it be You Lord?

I hear myself tell a neighbour

what life with Him is about

Do I believe what I teach?

Truth ministers to me

through my own mouth.

So you're really with me Lord?

Ambushed by Father

His arms outstretched

Will you let Me hold you? 

If you love Me

more than these,

will you feed My sheep?

As you feed them

with the truth you know,

Let me feed you with Mine?

When you don't understand

still will you trust Me,

Let Me be your everything?